#ptsd

I can't tell you how angry I am some days. The last few days my anxiety has been through the roof and I couldn't put my finger on what was causing it - then it hit me. I have PTSD. For over two years, our life has been stuck between extremes of so many emotions…

I am still struggling to find my way as a newly “single” mom of three. The burden is almost too much to handle. I have a job but can only work part time because of the kids school schedules. I have to be home in the morning to get them off to school and also…

It has been 848 days since the false accusation happened and our lives haven’t been the same. Days like today really bring me down, I haven’t heard from R since about 7am and normally he calls a few times to check in. Naturally my brains goes into worst case scenario every time because this situa...

I will never give you the satisfaction of knowing what you did to me. From Day 1 I kept telling you no. We were better friends because I KNEW you would never change. You convinced and took over my life. We had an agreement that YOU broke! How dare you!? Who do you think you…

Mental health office called again. Pushing me to find another doctor. It just reassures how I feel unwanted and too much of a "hassle" to deal with. Yesterday was his court date, I haven't heard back from the DA office on what happened. I can sit here and say I don't care but I do.…

I am feeling a bit more optimistic lately and a bit more capable of recognizing and breathing through my anxieties. I am also very happy that switching to a new birth control pill contributed to feeling a bit more stable. The underlying PTSD and anxieties are already there, and a negative hormone...

The values held by my father were manipulation, lying, and inflicting pain on others. Never humility, generosity, resiliency, honesty, kindness, integrity. I had to learn these along the way after I was a teenager. My mother taught me love, determination, and how to be fiercely protective of thos...

Hm..... I seem to feel a little bit better. And by that I mean... everything is still there, but maybe I am starting to feel more integrated. Like I am experiencing the range of emotions rather than stifling most of them. My anxiety is still very high, but usually the depression feels as high as&...

I have to keep trying to do the things that I love. I need to find my beads. I need to set up a craft area. I need to get a folding card table. These need to be priorities. Because I am loosing my damn mind. And I need something to do with my hands.…

I am looking for a fuck to give today. I see how tired my partner looks. Deep in his eyes, he's as tired as if he'd fought in three wars. His grandma who is like his mother is dying. He is in a crazy busy PhD program. And I am just loosing my shit over…